Post Your Love

So I couldn't sleep again last night, so I decided to go online.. I went to my list of friends and my Minister from my old church in Olds was online! We started talking about what was going on in our lives, and the people we were seeing.. and I shared my concerns with her (basically everything in my last post) and she started asking me questions..... After that I had a list of why Im with the person I am.. it was kinda amazing! I think I had a good 50 reasons Im happy and feel the way I do... So my great mind went to work and I ran to my office, grabbed some sticky notes and started writing down all the reasons I love Matt..


I then took all the notes and posted them all over the places I knew he would be in the morning.. His phone, the shower, the mirror, the toilet, the fridge, the Peanut butter and jam (he uses to make his lunch sandwich) and then right outside the bedroom door.....

This morning when he woke up I heard all the notes being taken down.. I went back to sleep and woke up to the biggest hug I think I have ever received!

This was the Text messages we had this morning after he left:

ME- I couldn't sleep again last night and I was talking to my old minister from back home and we were talking about you and all those things came up...

Matt- Aww well Im glad she helped baby. I loved those notes, you really made me smile this morning.

ME- LOL, I wasnt sure, it thought it may of been a lil creepy.

Matt- NO WAY! it was soo cute! I mean I already knew some of the things but it was really nice to actually know exactly how you feel. If anything it only made me love you more...

ME- Aww!!!



Yeah.. Boy drama is in the air... God Im good!

Changes

I dont know what is going on but for some reason it is 2:34am and I cant sleep.. so YAY I will entertain all of you.

You know that feeling when you are dating someone and you know there is a change, but you cant tell what it is.. You worry its you or something you did.. that maybe the person you are seeing has changed because they found someone new, or better than you.. Thats where I am right now.. I try to sleep, I hear him breathe.. I think things were off tonight SOMETHING IS WRONG!! Granted I am a gay man that tends to worry about EVERYTHING.. but I dont know this one is weird my gut is telling me something is up and it isnt good..

Why is Love so fucking hard.. I hate being alone, but I know im not in a relationship because of that... I feel like Im with someone I can see being with for a long time.. but why do I feel like I need to run away all the time... He has done so much already to show me that he cares and will do anything for me.. but why do I have this stupid feeling I cannot trust him?


Bla.... I refuse to give up without a fight! Ive been through enough shit already to just give up and walk away from it all......

Home at Last!

In my last posting I had mentioned that I was moving and how great the place is.. But I didnt know it was going to be so bad getting here.. Packing was hell, we needed to get a large bed over to the house and the friend we had with the truck kept falling through.. So we decided to rent a UHAUL... We get to the UHAUL place and they didnt have the mini truck in that I wanted to use, so they upgraded us for free to the biggest stupid truck they had!! Matt wasnt comfortable driving it so it was up to me.. and Lets just say scary as shit!! But we did it.. after we dropped off the big things we took the truck back and hopped in Matts car and were headed to my old place so I could do some more packing and grab clothes and such.. and BOOM!!! We were in a head on collision... All I remember was Matt saying oh no, and looking at the other light and it being red and then an air bag in my face... When I woke up there was all this white powder shit from the airbags in the air and I couldnt breathe.. I tried to get out and went to open my door till I realized thats where the other car was as I looked out the window and saw the face of the dude driving the other car.. At this point I started to panic because I couldnt breathe or get out of the car.... It was kinda cute the entire time Matt was freaking out asking if I was okay...

Everyone was okay, the ambulance people checked everyone out and let us go.. Matt ended up getting a ticket for running a Red light (even though I dont think thats what happened) But we are alive and everything is good now!

YAY LIFE!!!

Moving!!!

Well... the time has come for me to go... yes go.... Im sorry but I am sick of all the crap I put up with here,your stupid oldmanish homophobic ways and I am moving out TOMORROW!!

This was the note I wish I had left for my landlord.. But no.. everyone who knows me knows I have to be nice, so I handed over this months rent and said I was leaving.

I found the nicest place ever.. Its in a VERY old house and its an atic suite! It has 2 bedrooms (one is quite small so Im making it an office/spare room) It has a very old school feel to it and Im VERY excited to be moving in!! My man is going to be there all the time with me of course (biggest perk is not having to worry about having no where to "cuddle" anymore) It has a 20 x 20 deck that is surrounded by apple trees... I feel like writing a book or some shit...